I dont even know where to begin as far as what to say to you. I feel ashamed. i feel like you could never take me back like i have no direciton in my life because ive semed to drift away from the one who loves and adores me. father i cant seem to feel your love anymore. and htat scares me that i feel as if I am going around in circles, not knowing what my purpose and my destiny is in you. my desire just seems to have left
ive been selfish. self centered to the point where i have neglected hte most important relationship possible. God forgive me. i dont even know ehere to start off my sayin that im sorry.
i need you god
not tomorrow
not yesterday
i
need
YOU
NOW
father, open my eyes to your awesome power. how great you are. how awesome how amazing. let me hear your voice once again. i wanna come back but i forgot the way. god change me. i need you. i feel so numb inside. like no one could possibly understand me. not andre, not my mom no body. help me
help me jesus i need you NOW breka my heart. break the hardness the calluses from my eyes. show me the way. the way to your heart o god. the way back to you. cuz i realize that i need you and i want to have ytour heart. open my hearts to the broken the destitute. open my ears that i may hear ur voice and your voice alone. cut off al the distractions.
there comes a time in life where you have to make a decision to just stop.
Stop all the worrying about the hows and the what-if's and the maybe's and the I dunno's and just go for it. Stop all the whining about things that bother you and do what you can to change it. Stop trying to analyze a relationship, wondering what could go wrong and just enjoy what you have.
Why am I saying all of this?
This school year will be my last year in the protection of the four walls of high school; an environment that has, in a way, sheltered me from the cruel realities of the world. In a little more than 10 months, I will be forced into a dog eat dog world with rent, car insurance and the eventual 'settling down' with a husband and kids. The decisions I make over the next couple months will shape the rest of my life.
It's so hard to not consider all of the factors in my decisons for what path I'm going to take after high school. Right now I'm not even sure what that path is. I know what my dreams are, but there are so many different ways to reach them, I don't know what is in God's will for my life. Joey said it perfectly when he said ' just stop worrying about everything, the future and all. I bet once you just let it in go and stand back, you will see that everything will turn out just fine. ' I'm going to stand on that. Even though right now my head is saying I'm crazy.
25"But as for me, I know that my Redeemer lives, and that he will stand upon the earth at last. 26And after my body has decayed, yet in my body I will see God[a]! 27I will see him for myself. Yes, I will see him with my own eyes. I am overwhelmed at the thought!
